Top Ten Tips to Being the Hospitable Host By: Jacqueline Whitmore

Rest assured, in today’s fast-paced world, where most of us are short on time and resources, there are no absolute rules about parties. But the best rule to keep in mind is the five Ps: prior planning prevents poor performance. After all, the purpose of entertaining for business or pleasure is to show your guests a good time without getting too stressed out. Here are ten tips from my new book, Poised for Success, to help you get started. 1. Do your homework. Find out ahead of time if any of your guests have food allergies or other dietary restrictions and plan your menu accordingly or prepare a buffet with a variety of items from which to choose. My advice is to keep it simple and serve what you know. Don’t be like me and try to serve an unfamiliar, complicated, or labor-intensive dish your first time out, especially if you are entertaining your boss or an important client. One of your tried-and-true recipes is best. If you want to live on the wild side and serve something exotic or extra special, prepare it at least two or three times before you decide to serve it to guests. 2. Keep a list. Just as you would with a business plan, write down all of the items you need to make your meal complete. It’s especially frustrating when you think you have all of your ingredients and then discover in the midst of cooking that you don’t have enough salt, sugar, or butter. If that happens, I hope you have a good relationship with your neighbors, or you’ll be making a mad dash to the store at the last minute. 3. Have a variety of beverages on hand. The mark of a good host is to have a few bottles of red and white wine along with plenty of nonalcoholic beverages for the teetotalers in the group. 4. Stock up on snacks. This includes nuts, chips, salsa or dip, one or two different cheeses, crackers, and one or two kinds of frozen appetizers. Choose hors d’oeuvres that are easy to eat and require only one bite. This will ensure that no one gets crumbs on his or her nice outfit or on your floor. 5. Do as much as possible the day before. I like to set my table the night before. I also prefer to clean and polish my serving pieces and fill my salt and pepper shakers a few days before the party to avoid last-minute flurries. 6. Iron your linens. When you are serving cocktails, provide linen cocktail napkins or, at the very least, decorative paper cocktail napkins. For dinners, I prefer linen napkins because they’re more elegant than paper ones. 7. Set the mood. Candles are an easy, inexpensive, quick way to make any home more inviting. And we all know that everyone and everything looks better by candlelight. Buy as many candles as you can and place them throughout your house. Remember to reserve a few unscented ones for the dinner table. Light your candles approximately fifteen or twenty minutes prior to your guests’ arrival, and then light the candles on your dinner table just before everyone sits down to dine. 8. Choose your tunes. Music is a vital element in the staging of a good dinner party, as it sets the tone for the evening. Create a dinner party playlist on your iPod or iPhone or preset your CD player so there’s music in the air when your guests arrive and keep it playing throughout the evening. 9. Preset your coffee and tea service. About an hour before your party, set up your coffeemaker and put cream, milk, sugar, and sweetener in decorative containers. Put condiments in attractive bowls or containers rather than placing bottles directly on the table. Put your coffee cups, saucers, teaspoons, and assorted teas on a tray on a side table. 10. Keep fragrant items off the table. Scented candles and flowers can compete with and even overpower food aromas. I say this on behalf of anyone who’s ever been overwhelmed by the scent of stargazer lilies or a scented pine candle while attempting to enjoy dinner. Bonus tip: Make time for yourself. Allow plenty of time to shower, get dressed, and look your best for your party. You’ll want to greet your guests at the door with a relaxed smile on your face. The more prepared you are, the more comfortable you will feel, and the better time you’ll have at your own party. Jacqueline Whitmore is an international etiquette expert and the author of POISED FOR SUCCESS (St. Martin’s Press, Nov. 2011). Click here to order her new book: http://amzn.to/nNtJHj. She can be reached at www.etiquetteexpert.com